Sep 17, 2008
I received a phone call the other day–a call from a person who is sinking. Not from an elderly client himself or herself–but from the caregiver child. In my office “the kids” don’t play with Barbie or G.I. Joe anymore. They vary in age from 30 to 80. If mom or dad are in their 90s or over 100, it is possible to have children aged 60 to 80. A phone call to our office often begins like this: “My mom is elderly and ailing, and my siblings and I need advice on how to help her. Our folks have a decent monthly income and assets, but the nursing home costs are three times that much! Nobody made any plans for this. My parents never expected to live this long. We don’t know what to do. I can’t have them live with me. Help me, please. I don’t know what to do for them.”
The call from the kids has several possible motives, and more specifically, several underlying emotions:
Often we get a phone call from the child or spouse caretaker because the person in need of care isn’t ready to admit yet that they need help. We can’t force a parent to get assistance, but we can be the “voice of authority,” to tell them when it’s time to start letting go and facing reality. It is our job as elder law attorneys to help our senior clients–and those who love them–make tough end-of-life and long-term care decisions. We walk alongside of them and serve as a guide through the elder care journey.
My wife and I had our first child three years ago. That’s when we decided to set up a trust, should anything happen to either of us. We reached out to Zach Hesselbaum to help us out. He was very thorough and professional throughout the whole process. Zach went above and beyond to make sure that we understood every detail of setting it up and he did an excellent job. We recently had our second child a few months ago. With the new baby, he helped us make the necessary revisions to the trust. Zach made this process great for us! I would definitely recommend using him for any of your estate planning needs!
Tom G., Naperville, IL